Thursday, March 28, 2013

Still Waiting for U......................


Yah, I am still waiting
And waiting as per you said
I am patiently waiting my love.

I do agree, time is very cruel
It rushes and we won’t be able
To hold it tight
But, can this time change our love
The feelings, the moments
That we shared together?


Ya, I still believe you
Even if you did not speak
I can read it through you deep eyes
Those eyes where I used to dwell
That heart where I used to beat.

And even if you’ve turned indifferent
Even if you’ve turned mute
Even if you’ve successfully forbidden me

Somewhere one of the corners of my heart
still hopes you’ll return back
to hold my hand
to set a new journey together.



But for now, I have learned
to live without you or
say to live with you everyday
coz you haven’t escaped from me.

Where have you been?
I used to run far and wide
thinking you’ve been hiding in the crowd.
thinking you’ve been lost in the mist.

Tired at my defeat, I cried
whole day and night, night and day
silently under my quilt.

But now I’ve realized
To seek you outward was just in vain
Coz you’ve been hiding within me
You’ve been breathing within me
And I have finally found you
Finally found you!!!!!!!

Wednesday, February 27, 2013

Mirror Mirror on the Wall.......

Facing the mirror hanging on the wall
tried to admire own beauty
but every time I had a glance
I just saw cuts and bruises



I hurriedly applied the beauty enhancers
to hide those scars and scratches
instead i looked more horrible...




Covered my face with the scarf
but the pain was so deep and severe
Alas, I do remember the day
when u stabbed me so harsh..


I tried to escape but u chained
rugged my clothes and coerced against me
i struggled hard but turned numb and pale
in the pool of blood resembling a hell

Downstairs into the ball, I gazed to the crowd
lavished in the silk and glowing in the light
i slowly moved forward
hiding from the crowd...


A gentle touch, what i felt
" There you are, my lady love
You love bea-u-ti-ful tonight"
I replied with a gentle smile... 

Tuesday, February 19, 2013

Broken Heart

I heard it
loud and clear
No...............

Tears roll down
u kept me watching
u killed me again again




Brutal death : Love
Ignorance and Strangers
Hypocrisy

Unhealing wound, 
Solitude and
Broken heart!

Tuesday, January 1, 2013

Telling a Tale: Little Cormorant and his Solitude


                             
My book shelf needed a micro- cleaning as it was completely enveloped with dust. I felt pity over the books and note-copies. They might be cursing me for the plight. Suddenly, something fell over the head. Aww, I had a bump, it may be punishment for my deed. It was one of my very old note-book, I started flipping through the pages and interestingly I found my all time favorite incident.
 The loud alarm that dragged me out of my dream, the clock struck 6 am. The window pane was covered by thick fog and the view outside was completely blurred. Unwillingly, I got up from my bed.
I was attending training and bird-watching was scheduled in the morning. So, I armed myself with the binoculars, bird-book, note-book, pen and a camera. Narayani river was the destination as it was the season of migratory birds.
As soon as we entered the forest, I saw a chubby Crested Serpent Eagle staring at me. It was just amazing. Slowly, we headed towards Narayani.I couldn’t believe my eyes, what a spectacular view it was! There were hundreds of couples enjoying in the water. Don’t get confused with the humans; they are the ruddy shelducks, widely known as love-birds.
There were about 200 pairs; singing, dancing and madly in love with each other. I watched them for long time. Sometimes, they used to sprinkle water to each other, flap their wings, embrace, play hide and seek in river while sometimes girl would show some attitudes in ducky style and her beloved used to quack to impress her. It was fun to see the aquatic lovers.




I was scanning the area with the binoculars, suddenly; I was stuck at a lonely, black and tall Little Cormorant. The bird caught my sight and something was drawing me towards it. It looked sad and silent. It was standing on a stone at the bank and staring at the love-birds.
Though I wanted to stay more but had to return back for other tasks. I was waiting for another day to see him again. I saw the same condition of the bird every day. I wanted to study his behavior and in course of time, I had already developed some emotional bond with the bird.
‘Hey Cormorant, why are you here always alone?’ asked one of the shelducks.
‘Umm, I don’t have partner as u guys do, that’s why!’- Cormorant replied.
‘Oh, poor guy, don’t worry. You’ll get her soon.’
‘Phew, I am tired searching, I have neither luck nor beautiful face to lure a girl.’
‘C’mon, that’s not true. You are not that bad.’ She giggles.
‘Really? Or you are just flattering’
‘Why would I? Umm, would you believe if I asked you to be my friend?’
Cormorant was very very happy and replied, ‘Sure!’
Since the very day, Cormorant and shelduck were friends. He was very happy. They used to chat and play for long time. The neighboring birds were really glad to see the transformation on L. Cormorant’s life.
Time was passing by and Cormorant had started dreaming future with the shelduck. He felt that no one understood him like she did. He was in love with her but feared to express his feelings.
But, one very fine day, he collected his courage to propose her in the best possible way. But, opposite to his expectations, his proposal was rejected severely.
‘How could you ever imagine that I will fall in love with you? We are completely different. What made you think that we can be life-partners? I am, was and always will be your friend but not lover. I am sorry. I had come here to bid you farewell. My hubby is waiting me; I am returning today. Bye!’
Poor Cormorant couldn’t speak a word but his eyes were full of tears. His dreams were shattered very badly and he lost his one and only friend. He saw her flying with her love, far and wide. He just watched her till horizon and even further. That evening, there was a huge rain with loud thunderstorm. The Narayani was restless. Cormorant wept like he never had before. It seem even nature was sad for him.

Since that day, he is sad and silent. He always stares at the shelducks with the hope that anyone can understand him well and love him.”- one of the Senior Steppe Eagles narrated the story to me.
I felt very sorry for him and my love towards him got stronger. I wish I were a bird then I would love him very much and relieve all pains that lie beneath his heart. Unfortunately, I am not. The only thing I could do was; pray that he would find his lady love soon.
Time and tides wait for no men. So, I had to leave the place but before moving I wanted to see him one last time. As usual, I went to Narayani with my binoculars. I saw many ruddy shelducks making love and staying warm in the chilly winter morning. I didn’t find Little Cormorant. I searched here and there but there was not a single sight of him. I was worried.
With the heavy heart, I turned back. I was really disappointed not to find the Cormorant at the time of departure. Suddenly, I heard a loud call of flock of birds. I was spell bound to see about 300 Little Cormorants flying above the Narayani. I had no words to express my happiness and you know what, my sweet Little Cormorant was leading the battalion with a cutie Miss Cormorant by his side. They performed their ‘Cormorant style’ which was far better than Psy’s Gagnam style indeed. Then, he came flying near me, touched me gently and flew back. Awww, this was the best farewell that I ever had in my life.
The pages were over and I found myself in the same filthy room with books spread all around. I am happy for the Cormorant as he got the love that he was craving for ages. Wherever he is, I will always love and pray for the happiness of my Little Cormorant.

Monday, December 31, 2012

INTO THE WILD-2


Jungle owlet hoots early in the dawn
And drags me out of my dream
Unwillingly, I molt from the sleeping bag
‘Let’s go commandos’ I hear a call
He’s none other than our Raju dai!

Around the fire, we gather
Rapid fire round ticks in the clock
Heart beats as if it’s gonna explode now
Everyone looks pale as if they are sentenced to hell.

With the arms and ammunitions (C’mon not for the war)
Including binoculars, books, note books, pen and camera
Along the transects we march ahead into the wild.

Oh, that’s black kite points one
No, that’s Osprey yells another
‘sssh, this is a jungle not a fish market’
We start whispering.

Few steps ahead, we fit our camera traps
Hoping to capture all the animals
When it comes to perform walk test
I am always a Rhino!
 
We hear a strange noise behind the bushes
Wow, there’s a rhino enjoying his meal
Hiding behind the trees, we try to have a glance
And enjoy the scene.

Following the pugmarks, scats and pellets
We run across the river, forest, grasslands
Every day is a new learning
And a new experience!

Unloading ourselves around the fire
And howling like jackals
Having fun with no limitations
Followed by some important lessons.

Power-points, paper-works and all the hard tasks
Inspiring movies and wonderful documentaries
were just amazing
(With the background music of snores was always well collaborated)

Birds to cats and pugmarks to scats
Butterflies to snakes and frogs to crocs
We kept on following but sometimes it sucks!

No matter how far we walked
No matter how hard we worked
All the memories that we spent together
are fresh like the scats in the bank of Narayani.

With the aspirations to become
Wildlife biologists, birdist or
Experts of herpeto-fauna and butterflies in the days to come
We march ahead into the wild!!

Saturday, December 15, 2012

THE LOST WARRIOR


The mighty canines that smeared many preys are now blunt
The tusks that clashed in great battles are just show cases
The growls of bear that was once so loud has turned mute
The birds have stopped singing and monkeys have stopped climbing
The rhinos and hippos have no works except sleeping and basking.

Isn’t it pathetic?

And no more wild as the wilderness is gone
Have turned to living specimens with nothing own
Compelled to live behind the bars
And hear the human’s noise and tease.
The legendary is dead and gone.



“Oh dear human, please leave me free!
Let me spread my wings and fly in the sky
Let me run far and wide
Let me sing the songs I like
Let me live my own life”
Is what I read through their eyes!

Friday, October 19, 2012

LEFT ALONE

Flipping through the pages of my torned diary
every words, letters, sentences are so fresh like the smell of the wet soil
Alas! Is this me?
'We'll never be apart'- is what u said
I smiled back.
'I can't imagine my life without you,' is what i replied.
Now, here I am, we are apart and I am still living!
U used to say  ' u'll never leave me'
Now, I am left alone to freeze


I was begging u, crying over u
but my voice turned mute to u
U no longer feel me
Strangers, what we have become.

I was shattered, trampled
by the disaster that fell upon me
I yelled, cried, punished myself the way i can
with the bruises all around
I was aghast at the pool of sheer emptiness

Struggling everyday to overcome the agony
I do numerous silly acts
but again, at the end of the day
I am haunted by your image
ur presence hallucinates me
but u slipped through my finger tips
and i couldn't hold you tight

Crippled by the malady u gifted me
i am learning to  live everyday
once the soulmates ,now stand aloof
Fairy tales no longer exists, is what i learned


Together we shall remain, we had vowed
Gone with the wind, washed with the rain
Now here I am left alone
with all my Loneliness!!

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